Saturday, April 10, 2010

Running With Smiles

I sucked up the decision this morning to sign up for driving classes. The truth is I know if I relied on others in my family to teach me, I may never learn how to drive. So I'm sacrificing the ridicule I may get from them, some money and taking that big step forward. I did it and classes for me don't start until the first weekend of May. I thought I would be more nervous, I do feel bad having to go behind my fathers back to do it. But this is for me. I need to do this.

I was chatting online this morning with a few of my friends. One tells me what my X's cousin filled her in on, that the family ( his family ) wasn't all to happy with what's going on with him. I texted with my X a couple of days ago. I already know the scoop. He's saving to move out and going on his Hawaii trip with his girlfriend... We've been separated for seven months, he's been with the new girlfriend for six and a half? I would think by now, if he's saving up for a place ( with/without his new girlfriend ) I have no clue, don't really care. But I would think he would have introduced her to the family... OH WELL. ( I was smiling at the thought that they weren't happy with him... but they should be, because he's found someone he does love and is changing [ hopefully for the better ] for. ) But it's nice to know you're missed by people that you were once so much a part of their lives. I must have done something right. :P Then again... who doesn't love me? ( yeah I'm being cocky ) hahhaha.

When I was strapping on my shoes to go for a run, the little one wanted to come along. He was yelling at me to take him with me. I couldn't. The last time I took him he almost died. He's just not big enough and too old to survive 5k of running. On my run, I saw another runner that said hi to me. ( I actually wanted to run by and high 5 for being active and fit, but I would have looked like a crazy person with their hand up trying to get a high 5. Why am I so weird sometimes? ) Sometimes it's nice to get a smile from a total stranger. I also saw some friends drive by, and slowed down to ask what I was doing... I said 5K.. and they were like what @_@ ...and we went on our ways. My run is really refreshing. You start flat land then down hill, then flat land , then up hill, then flat land again. LOL. Like life. Ups and Downs and Stability in the end. I don't really know what I think about during my runs but every time in the beginning I always enjoy the view. WOW... the view. I'll take a picture next time when I have my phone on me during the run.

Yesterday I went out with my friend Ben for dinner, he took me to the Keg and I ate a steak. I was okay with is cause I didn't feel sick after which is *thumbs up*. I guess I needed the iron. He told me about the girl he's seeing. That she's becoming too clingy for his liking. I start to ask myself if I'm even close to ready to date openly again... NO. Just the other day someone on my msn that I added from POF kept telling me about his sex adventures with girls he's dated and he kept making the assumption that we were going to meet. Or even have a chance of dating. He asked if we would ever meet. I said, probably NEVER. I'm sorry... I'm not like that... The people I choose to share intimate moments with are only the ones I can picture myself with or making beautiful babies with. [ I don't settle for just ANYONE. I have standards ~_~ One night stands are not my thing ... EVER! ]

I started filming my rejection video.. just a little part of it. I wonder how I'm going to film the rest of it. LOL ... and I should start designing something for another video.... I'm hungry from my run...and I think I'm going to eat that subway sandwich the bro left for me. :)

Oh yeah, and yesterday I kinda texted DY into going on a date with me...LOL.
I know were supposed to be on break.. ( I seriously don't know what that even means anymore )...but it was funny to me. I really want it to be casual. I told him nothing serious... and that he better not go falling in love with me and shit. :P

I really feel like painting tonight. Too bad Cammy has been shipped off to Ontario for repairs. I hope to get her back soon all fixed up.

I can't believe how much I've done already in the span of this my 26th year of life. LOL, why do I keep thinking I'm older like 28? and that if I don't find someone to be with now, I'm never going to have babies. I guess cause my brain is factoring the years it takes to build a relationship up to the stability when both parties are ready to get married and have babies...yeah... I'm pretty sure I'm never going to have babies... FML ... hahaha jkjkjk.

I was talking to Tyler, an old friend from high school on facebook. He was very sweet to say the babies I would have would be very cute! ... of course they would.. come on! look at me ... hahahaha jkjkjk.

( I guess you can tell that I'm in better spirits to day than I've been in the last couple weeks. ) Tomorrow will be better than it is Today. Tomorrow will always be better because I will be better. Why do I always forget that? Forget the love I have for me. I always forget the love CC has for me too... the husband has been very touchy lately wanting to cuddles. :) Too bad he's stinky.
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