Behind SyloArts

Well let me sum up the last two days for you, On Friday, the boyfriend came to pick me up around late afternoon. He let me drive to Richmond and back to Vancouver. The store he wanted to go visit was closed. See, I've learned over the years to control my emotions - A cool cat in situations. It's not that I don't care, it's I don't see why I should waste energy through certain ways. One fills their life with drama because they may love the scattered emotional highs of different situations. Me, I learned scattered energy is not always the best thing. Focus on what you need to do and want to do the things you need to do. Don't focus on their problem, focus on yours. Be happy for others and wish them happiness. If you want the best for others, the best will be bestowed onto you. Smile at others and let them go on their merry way. Don't focus your mind on useless things. Christmas present I got from the boyfriend was - Despicable Me Movie and Davidoff - Cool Wa...

On Thursday I finished up the 6 canvas' and sprayed on the clear coat the seal them. Just in time for DJ to come and get me to go help me out and get them up. I wanted to keep it from the rest of the world where these are going up like a surprise. I had a strange feeling that I had to get these paintings done and up like some kind of recognition that this all is not in vain. That my life was not all in vain. I am living on a time limit. I only have so much time left to set up a series of events to alter and create the very thing that may define - ME. I finish the "Return To Me" series, only to imagine and start anew art series. One more beautiful in my minds eye and I can only pray that it physically manifests into something greater. I can only imagine and hope for a great art show at the end. When I was putting the finishing last strokes onto these paintings, I'll be honest, I was on the verge of tears. Thinking about how beautiful they were becoming, thinking - woul...

Hello, beautiful mess For someone with 2 hours of sleep- I'm feeling pretty awesome. Although not all things are working out as the day started to. It's okay cause they are going to get done. Things are on my list for a reason. Things happen for a reason. I watched two videos before my lunch and theses are. Do what you love and do it. Argue- but get it over and done with and make up your mind and just - leap. The guys next door in the new office set up come and go. I see them looking in the window and one said hi to me as I walk back to my office from the washroom. I said hi back to be nice to the white guy in suits. - I love guys in suits. I could go to a get together tonight but the parents made a request for me to be at home. I have the rest of the week off. What am I going to do? Work- personal stuff that is. Portfolio. Photos. Setting up more stuff on the comp. Posting videos up. I had lunch today with people at work. The bosses - my boss and the other company we share the...

2 hours of Sleep. But that's okay. I spent the night painting. While my Bf works, and everyone slept. I finished my six piece painting. I changed my original concept for pure pandas. I just couldn't get the girl to work to my full advantage so I think I'll save her for something else. I painted my pandas and then on my fifth panda I realized I wasn't recording! Sucks. But I guess life goes on . I wake up this morning with a little dreading cause of the little sleep I had but I showered put on perfume and my clothes since today is lunch !!! :) and I'm listening and singing to Bruno Mars as I walk to the bus stop and looked up at the beautiful sky. It wasn't vanilla but a bright white shining through the clouds. I have a biggest feeling of. Life's so good right now. I guess it's the knowing I have great friends. Creative, talented and supportive. My back hurts and I hurt my ankle on the bus. Basically I was stepping up on the back, the bus moved and my fo...

Feeling It I'm feeling a lot of things at the moment. Back pain, bloating cause aunt flows preparing herself for some grand entrance. I'm currently listening to Beyonce and she's just amazing! Wow. Boyfriend was being very sweet yesterday till this morning. Well he's very sweet a lot of the time really. But as he held me as I was playing little big planet while he slept. It was - humbling - and to think of the things we have been through together in a short amount of time. Many dejavu's are happening in a sequence of different subjects that I don't know if I should act on as I saw in my dreams or will things change? Because I'll change it. What happens if we believe we change our future as we see them. But then the alternate outcome has been foreseen as well. I was on the verge of tears. Placing myself in the 'I'm dying' state of mind. I was starting to imagine my funeral. Who would come. From in and out of town. If any- at that too. And the une...

Relapses Suck For the longest time I was feeling so good. Tiny symptoms come back. I told SJ and advised I should work out and just keep at it. Bf stayed over the weekend at my place. He arrived in the afternoon of the night before where I had finished the 6 piece panel background. We had dinner at a near by restaurant called the Chili pepper house. And then the next morning we went for dimsum and an attempt at Christmas shopping for his parents. But Ry likes to do his research before purchasing anything. I went looking for a jewelry rack cause mine is non existent since moving. And now I'm looking for a jewelry box or looking into building one. Ry thinks I should just buy one. But things out there just don't have enough to hold my collection of awesome earrings. I got my closet extension where it allows me to attach an other row below my existing hanging rod. So I have two tiers. At least I was somewhat. I video edited as the boyfriend slept. He sleeps a lot. I'm a little ...

My thoughts are all over the place and the last thing I need from anyone is be-littlement from anybody. Especially hard when I feel it from the significant other. I find myself looking in to Condenser Mics and audio recording equipment. Gadgets. I got to figure out how I can set up some things on the new comp. Such as my camcorder. Considering it can be used as a webcam for pc's. My design programs aren't working. So I'm trouble shooting at the time. My macbook's filled with files I have to convert. I still have to produce the music for the next two songs to push out as youtube videos. I need to clear the space on the comp in order to film the remaining last two - three videos. What's in store for tomorrow, I really don't know. I need to build my jewelery rack / holder. Put up the christmas tree. set up the guestroom. move some book selves. ( That's if I can ) Move out some of the renovation tools into the storage room. There's nothing more tha...

Death Date No, this isn't about suicide - but it is about death. Me and my bud last night made a plan. As one of D_Meths projects is coming to an end. Mine will begin with a directed painting every week. My question is how I use everyone In the crew to an advantage. By the end of these 15 weeks and we switch back to the producing music thing. I suggested we look at our final date that was want to accomplish it all by is mid April. Instead of looking at this as a due date. We need to look at it like it's our death date. That - that's when the doctor told you- you were dying. So everyday till then your life is going to majorly change. No- there is no treatment, your cancer is in it's final stages so treatment won't help. So what would you do? You re-align your goals. Tell the ones you love you love them and let go of any grudges and and you start to love differently. spend time with people more. You think about- who should you tell- who you need to tell- who shouldn...

The days begin It's somewhat of a beautiful morning. Spent two days with the bf and had one of the best dinners I've ever had for our anniversary dinner. The bf took me to the boathouse. It was so good! I love good food and theirs was just fantastic! They even gave us complement dessert to celebrate the anniversary! I was so full already but some how found room for this delicious delight! The food was so good I was on the brink if shedding tears! As I sat there and ate I realized I enjoyed the - dressing up and going somewhere nice to eat. And I thought if that was what was missing before. Enjoying ourselves and great food. Bf says it's too bad that I was never really taken out to enjoy such things - it is unfortunate but he took the initiative to do it which is nice. Bf got me a ps3 for anniversary and I got him a few copies of his car printed on poster board and some on vinyl. A picture that was taken for the upcoming feature thats going to be in a car magazine. We should...

Skytrain Delights 1 I love vanilla mornings and the day is just beginning. I'm dressed up with flats and the heels are in my bag. Lugging my bf's present around. I hope he likes it. My stomach is starting to hurt again. I guess I've been in the green so much now a days when sick days come I'm blah... Either that or I'm getting my period. But that ended not too long ago. I really don't know why I'm calling this skytrain delights. Yesterday I came up with a thought- what happens if we dream our dreams ( the ones we feel are so real ) . We remember for a moment after I waking and they fade. What happens if that fading is only a stage of it manifesting into reality. That the fade is a process it must undergo for it to happen. I had a dream once I woke up from my bed with my husband cooking pancakes for the kids. I used to remember their faces so clearly - but I'll be honest to say it's fading. I remember almost everything but their faces and I wonder ...

Happy 6 Months I'm writing this to remind myself that Good moments should be better than one sliver of doubt. The understatement of where my heart lies is not your choice but mine. Your doubts are not mine. I love ... His eyes when they meet mine. How he holds the door open for me. How he reaches his hand over the dinner table as we wait for our food. How he holds my hand when he drives. - How he holds my hand anytime. The little sigh he makes when I hug him, when he makes it clear he'd like a hug. How cute his feet are. How much more social he is than me. When he let's out funny noises Randomly. How he sings commercial radio songs out loud. How he picks me up with ease. When he tells me little facts. When I don't know something I'll ask him, and he'd answer intelligently. The memories we have already made. I can't believe it's been 6 months already.

Is it Strange? Is it strange that I love taking transit sometimes? The sight and sounds. Smell not so much. The grind of the track, the shakes and sways. I was watching this show once with the millionaire matchmaker. She said- if they don't say I love you in the first six months, consider moving on. I wonder if this is true. That one should. Then I question- do I have too much love that it just doesn't add up sometimes. Should I stop. I don't know if I'm in the good or the bad. Like the day, the feeling, that breathlessness won't come anymore. I'm I wanting more than just the norm. I don't do default. Boyfriend said I'm high maintenance. Is this true? Maybe I'm asking too much from him? Am I giving too little. I didn't tell him that kinda hurt me. I tend to believe I don't ask for much. I don't complain when it's not needed. Maybe the perception of myself is not as fantastic. He kind of complains more than I do. Things I know he ...

The Pain Well the summary of my weekend. Friday-after work, I met up with DJ who fed me. He bought a whole bunch of food from T&T and it was fantastic. After than I Then that night rolling over to Saturday - I worked on restoring one of my clients site that was hacked. It was so rough, structure re-building is rough! Then later on that night I wanted to end it painting but I didn't have enough gigs on my computer- two series of painting the 6 piece footage took up a lot of space. I had to clear it, move it, or publish and delete some stuff. I also had to create the beat for the footage. Which I ended up passing out doing. Sunday- I went out to have breakfast with my friend Ben. I hadn't seen him forever and it felt nice to sit and talk to him and find out about his crazy girlfriend. I've been hearing stories about crazy girls. On Facebook my friends have been also posting vids about how individuals feed the poorest of the poor. Even when they don't have income comi...

Return I wonder sometimes is it worth it. It's hard now to be in a relationship and keep my head up to believe we are going to be just fine- I'm jaded - I really don't know what to believe anymore. I'm starting to believe the train wreck break up fucked up my perceptions. It re-aligned my goals but in the process - suspended my emotions and self worth. My emotions are so scattered now- yet I know that I should pull them together to do my art. It's the only way. Or I'd really mentally lose myself. Strange yesterday when I heard some news about the ex's baby being due in January - I'll be honest to say I did feel sad. It's that thought again that I just didn't have what it takes with him. Then I start to doubt that even have what it takes at all. That - that happiness won't come for me - ever. I then wake up to remind myself- I should never think I'm not worthy of anything. Cause it's not true. I re-evaluate the great guy I'm with...

Blank Anyways I don't have much to blog about. Had one of the best sleeps I've had this week. By myself that is. I had a meeting yesterday with SJ and went home after- worked out - downloaded some stuff for the computer which ended up short circuiting my whole basement when I turned it on. Then again I had the heaters going. I realized I have to move my computer to be closer to my art area for when I film my art time lapses. It would be ideal to Keep it as is but sometimes life says pick. I passed out researching more layouts on how my new portfolio should look like. I think I have one but uncertain and looking for more. Is it that difficult to look for already made templates I can just custom alter. If I could write the code for a total custom design I would but I need it to function flawlessly. Right now it's like I have no resume to go with what it is I do. I have a rough idea of how I want my print portfolio to be. I just have to look for my hardware now. I have to put ...

Feels like Forever Since I blogged that is. The days seem shorter now. Meetings at the beginning of the week and I feel like I don't want to see anyone anymore for a while. Considering I used to be a major loner. Really. I'm still grasping around the fact that I'm juggling all this. I don't even have kids yet or my own place. Ohh I should put on make up. Crap I don't have a mirror. I'm now thinking I should be more organized in my room. So earring holder and bracelet holder and necklace holder. A part of me is ready to pack up the vinyls and KH models but they are still too awesome to me to let them just sit in a box. I have a lot of cleaning to do. Around my work area. Monday I had a meeting with Chris and a few of his friends. And John was there and some familiar faces but it was more a friend hanging out event but business was involved. Yesterday I had a meeting with a friend of a friend that work for primeamerica. Their retirement plan thing looks a bit - g...

Sleeping Giant I'll be honest, I really don't know why I named this sleeping giant. Bf just got off work and I didn't know he was coming to get me. Atleast not right when he got off work. Well now I can't go back to sleep and I had to finish the design for this weeks d_Meth song drop. We had a get together the other day ... I don't remember if I blogged it but my creative family is just the right kind of friends that don't really ask.. What do I get from doing this? But more of... What can we do for you? - which was a Dejavu moment when Brian said it. I'm hungry- today I'll be going to get my comp built and I wonder what is the right monitor to get. I worry I'll find flaws and hate it. I had a weird dream with my friend DJ in it. Errr won't go into detail but it was weird. Do you know what series of numbers I keep seeping besides doubles is now 8:08 - what is the significance of that - I don't know. I am running out of white paint and I wonde...

Trails Of Me There's a piece of me left underneath the stairs- in the cabins - on the island. They remember the magical place you brought me where the sand seemed to endlessly meet the sea. Do you think of me when your feet walk on to the sands? There's a piece of me left in a moment of time. Where celebrations mixed with confusion - when you squeezed me in your arms then decided to let me go. Will you think of me when a new year turns to past? There's a piece of me left hung on your walls - where water flows and bubbles rise onto the surface. How a trade seems more than just. Do you still love me when you look upon them? There's a piece of me left within your memories. And it's the same in reverse. Is it a trail that I'm leaving? or a silent curse? Scattered images through out time- where I can no longer call them mine. There are so many of you that I've sadly now forgot - forced to push them out of mind just to save my heart. There's a piece of me lef...

What did you do yesterday? Dad left for Chicago - or at least I think he did considering he left early. Wow I think I only had a few hours of rest till my mom barged in my room to tell me it's a snow storm and wondering if I'll be going to work cause she won't be. Unless there's like a foot of snow - I don't think I have an excuse. I mean - it's not school - we don't get cancelations with work. Unless you get fired. I'm so hungry. I hope no one bugs me tonight cause I want to purely paint tonight. Or create - graphic design wise. No interruptions please. Yesterday I had work as usual and then after - I met in person someone I had been meaning to meet for a while. This guy to me is talent. He feels so well in the loop of Vancouver. And me little shy thing. I think what he does is pretty brave - the events - yet he thinks I'm brave for the YouTube stuff. I'm having a moment of Dejavu - of several events. Strange. We spoke about what we do and wha...

Get this - Lady comes into see someone who my company shares offices with. I go to check if he's in. He's not. She starts asking me when / if he's going to be.. I say I don't know - I'm not the secretary. She asks if there is someone she can talk to - I go look for the other guy that works here for that company. He's on the phone. I tell her that... I ask if the person she came to see knows she would be here / it was a set meeting. She said No but she said she would drop by. She asks if she should call him... I say yes... and she looks at me like I'm crazy and I was not helpful at all. [ Sorry lady, I can't help you when you came unprepared ]

Again with the rudeness Seriously again with the people just pushing their way to get out of the bus. We are all catching the same train, what is one second to wait for someone who's already standing to clear out first. It's courtesy. And if you wonder why people are rude to you?! If you want courtesy - fucking preach it! Ok that's enough - well yesterday I went on a huge detour just to get to the art store for the canvases that I'll be painting and putting up in Starbucks. It was the biggest canvas - I had 6 that I had to lug via transit but the worst part was getting there! The skytrain delayed because of most likely a suicide - selfish people - which caused major back up and then there was this other incident with the tracks malfunctioning. Omg really! Then I take the wrong bus that doesn't stop at all stops So I had to do a loop around the city. It was just really bothersome. Then I had a meeting with some D-Meth members. Some because not everyone was there. ...

Waking Up Happy It's good to have this feeling. To wake up and snuggle warmly in your bed. Alone is not how I prefer it sometimes but a little alone time doesn't hurt. Time: 8-16 in the morning and I wonder if there are any unwritten rules when sitting on the skytrain. How your legs should be, arms. EEhhh I'm small. Anyways- I spent last night re-uploading design programs onto my laptop. Success is what makes it that much sweeter. Designing in my warm room is good. Maybe this will buy sometime to save up what I need for the new comp build. I mean I have enough to purchase it now but that's sacrificing some spending money and saving money per month. I think Um just glad I can design off my lap again. But I know for a fact that I can't video edit time lapses on there anymore and the laptop will soon have to dubbed as work only and travel. Where the files have to be cleaned out regularly. Do people not lean forward to relief shoulder contact while sitting any more or ...

Stuck in my Head Last night boyfriend said he was crazy about me which made my heart warm to him... Then he said he maybe hawked up on sleeping pills to know what he's saying. I dunno to laugh or to just *hmmmpphh!!!! * *upset face*

Protect yourself! Great video that conveys what it needs to with no words. Young ones should not watch this. Im not promoting sex at all but I give props to this greatly produced commercial. Check out this video on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m4DW-hdXcH8&feature=youtube_gdata_player

I Will Punch You In The Face If you speak stupid random things at me. I don't think I can tolerate the things that certain people say. Don't disrespect the music I'm listening to - do not discount Kanye Wests' artistic skills and visionary as any other - garbage song. Ugh - it made me mad when he said - " is that what goes for music now a days?" what are you? 100? - he said he was kidding but like some - some remarks aren't funny. And don't compare yourself to me- someone said they believed they were o ahead of the game. - I hate to burst your bubble but I've only been playing 10% of my full potential. As I recovered from one of the most life changing years of my life.

It's Snowing! Do you know it's very hard to look sexy in snow boots. Wait unless you're in a bikini And snow boots - then someone can probably pull it off. I keep thinking of Toronto the few days or weeks. I guess it could be that because it was around this time last year I was there? - one year - what's changed? A lot? Or not enough? I worked till 3:00 am this morning. And more an more I'm only getting 3-4 hour sleep on work days. And my dad wonders why I can't wake up in the morning. I can wake up- getting out of a nice warm bed- that's a different story. What was I doing? - well you see since moving and all that jazz I had'nt had time to do laundry. 3-4 loads of laundry. Washing - drying and folding. I moved my final dresser in and now the room- furniture wise is complete. Unpacked- is another story. Slowly but surely it's getting there. And I spent my last few hours designing this Saturdays Desi Method songs cover art. This weeks will perhaps ...

Say the Positive your negativity can remain and live with you. If you choose to spread hate- I will look at you with disgust. We're better than that. We may not think a like. But the last thing I like to hear from anybodies mouth is total smack. Sometimes people can find other people's sarcasm as crude. I'm too nice to say to someones face that they are being an asshole. So watch what you say- dim your ego that can be broken like an eggshell and remain humble. Don't believe you're above so many. If you're going to make a statement of such high stature- I- out of a few have the biggest urge to knock you off your high horse. Stop living to make others see- what you're made of. Especially to those who weren't paying much attention to you in the first place. Live for yourself - don't turn your downs to ups for anyone else but you. If you do the things you do to show up a certain someone - you have a chance to become very unhappy. There's no doubt abo...

Sunny Then Cloudy This is the basic norm of Vancouver weather. Frick I'm hungry. I just woke up at 7- I'm gonna goto work and eats! I really don't know what to write this morning. I exercised last night doing the light jog to brisk walking thing altering at every minute. Tiring really. Even more dangerous when you're making a protein shake at the same time. The other day- I traded in my lotto ticket. On three sets I got a free draw. What are the odds of that? After work yesterday I went to go pick up my jewelry and it's so shiny and new looking! Clean earrings for the win! After that I met up with SJ. He seemed a little stuck on how to promote. I spat out every idea I had. Who and where to go. Who he should be contacting. I seemed to have sparked something. My abs are still sore. But my body feels tighter. I'm wondering if I should go look for my knee high boots. :( but to be honest I had dedicated most of my expenditures of this month to go towards others and...

Running Late Just a tad today. Yesterday was a strange happy day with babies smiling at me in the bus. Once in the morning and once on the way home. My sister would say it's the auras of people they are sensitive to. Well I really don't know if they are looking at me or whatever chooses to stand beside me - guardian angel wise. As I got home from work - I got changed and worked out. - full body on my own. I don't know if me wanting to just relax and sleep was due to the work out but - I remember waking up with a body jump as I dreamt I went into a run. Omg - dream working out. I have a headache this morning . I'm just gonna rest a bit now.

I have to admit, someone I dated made me fall in love with snap peas. I'm crunching on some right now and I'm thinking. Why?! why did I have to start eating this wonderful veggie that's crunchy, a bit sweet, and good for you.

Don't Be Rude I don't know when the courtesy of waiting for someone who sits before exit or standing in a bus was thrown out the window, but they better go outside and retrieve it cause I'm tired of this - rudeness. I may say that I courtesy wasn't something I grew up being taught with, like many things I naturally adapted through the years as a teen. But when did people stop practicing common courtesy? Don't be rude. What's the rush? This city's full of people who believe their lives are more important than so many others. Eyes wide open please. Man I woke up this morning with my upper abs hurting. Yesterday I woke up. Made breakfast and ate before DJ came over to give me a -1on1- personal training session of basics. He showed me lightly my nutrition plan, and we went for a light jog and came back to show me a few work outs to do. My arms are sore too. Yesterday was just a light work out too. I'm gonna die later today. If I don't blog Tomorrow morni...

He shivers - I warm him in an embrace. I'll let him sleep with me tonight.

Desi Method is going on 9 weeks in a row of putting out songs every Sat. and this weeks was Radiophonic. We had a meeting earlier this week about how the shoot should look, but I simply wanted to plug ideas in and wanted Vik to take control of the shoot and see what he could flush out. More than anything I want to see what this crew is made of. To be honest, they have yet to fail me. It's one of the reasons why I'm still in it to win it. I spent Friday night and today with Ry ♥ . We slept like bears till 12 *super lazy!* and then got up and got dressed and went to dim sum at Dai Tong. Really good, but I felt like we ate really fast. After dim sum we went to PNE - there was a shoe sale going on. Ry thought he would be able to score some shoes. Turns out to be all girls. On the way in it said some "petite" shoes sale signs. What a crock of lies! Considering they only had one sad little rack of 5&1/2's ( had like 4 pair of shoes on it ) and 5's. We lef...

Yesterdays Well what's more to say than yesterday was a bit interesting. I spent most of the day cleaning - I swept up the kitchen and mopped the floors, cleared our the room and swept and mopped those floors, put on the tint on the window. SJ and his brother came and we went to Ikea. When I first went, I was a bit cautious if the boxes would fit. SJ - we'll make them fit. Well I didn't know how big the boxes were till I saw them and I was worried. Then the guys started to worry. I purchased it and somehow the guys fit it. ( although this is pretty dangerous) they slid he boxes down the center resting on the center console. The thing is two boxes that sat on top rested between headrests to keep them in place. - see that's all on a 'still' theory but when movement is introduced you have to be careful. See there was my headrest behind the drivers that so on a right had turn and the back swings. My head and RJ's head is safe because my headrest stops the back ...

Another Day It's a holiday tomorrow, but it's one of remembrance. To think about all those who died in the wars. Would you give your life to serve a country? To protect the people. I've thought about it- joining the army. But a lot of people say I maybe too short- like when I wanted to be a cop. Oh well. Yesterday I went to work like any other but the day was filled with forehead hitting at the disbelief at the current client's website that I'm trying finish by Friday. Wow- I really hate doing things again and again. Ahh I'm being paid for it. - what should I eat this morning?- I'm in transit to work as I write this. I'm so blank. Feeling tired. I'm happy the dog slept the night through. I had the weirdest dream about zombies in my house, having an adopted Caucasian son who was a very big kid. I'll tell you right now- I'm si getting a samurai sword this summer, cause again in my dream I didn't have the motorcycle helmet and sword to prote...

Have you ever had a moment that felt like one of the past. As I was moving stuff downstairs and grabbed some of my belongings and was heading towards my room I felt something. I felt like how I felt in Toronto. See I'm a pretty shy person, trying to break away from my natural shyness. I don't know what it is that makes me feel like it was when I was there. The air? - The comfortableness? The independence? falling asleep... blog entry continues tomorrow.

DISS I seem to like to skip morning pages in the weekends. Let me sum it up for you. Friday after work I went to go visit my sister and the baby. I was in the line waiting for the bus when she said she'll come pick me up. I'm holding a package inside with Chrismas presents for people. - that reminds me I should ship a package out back home ( home land ) - that has presents :p . - I accompanied my sister to KFC as she picked up dinner. I ended up giving the books I got for Christmas early. I can get something else for him later on. I got home later that night and wrapped Ry's other present that came in the box. That's night I also got to work on trying to solve the D-Meth site problem of not having a navigation at the bottom of the site to view previous pages. I didn't solve this problem till Saturday morning - where I woke up pretty early to work on stuff. Later on that evening I accompanied my dad to an Art show where my piece is placed in. Not really promoting thi...

TGIF I'm usually never appreciated weekends. I used to work such off and on days. Its been strange at work, as it's all piling up- my boss refers to me as the senior designer. He's making me take on other tasks that make it difficult just to do my work straight on. I can't just design- I have to think and bounce back information of what will work, and what wouldn't for a client site out if given content. I guess I have to take on more responsibility as our client list is growing double the rate from last year. Me and my boss are both Libras so this boost of fast and furious changes apply to the both of us if this is universal energy bouncing back at us. I'm looking flight centre deals and I feel like going on a vacation. LOL . Wow Jamaica seems so cheap to go vacay. I don't know what to write this morning. I've been busy at work. I was on the bus going home yesterday - researching a bit on loft spaces in Vancouver and New West. Two people hop onto the b...

My Core Hurts I started my first personal training session run yesterday. 45 mins non stop. And I'm sore. Especially my core. Well yesterday at work was more Like any other. After work booked my butt to meet with DJ and went for a run around a track. See during this time it should have been meditative. But I ended up calling my dad in the middle of it. See since having more Friends around me, ( like usual more guys than girls ) my dad thinks I'm being stupid or fooling around. Its pure friendship and business. I know - business and friends sometimes don't work. But this does. Cause right now our main focus is not money. We don't even want to focus our energy there because we all know we're not g to be the best at what we do - for money. People may ask, what for. Honestly, to see what we are capable of and nothing more. We aren't competing with anyone else but ourselves when we say we want to be better. Our focus is us and what we can do. Not what we can't. N...

3am Tears Yeah, I got my response email from my brother getting a room swap. Too it wasn't only a decline but him clearly stating the fact of what he thought of me - not so nice things to repeat. Some things he stated were true, some he clearly doesn't get / understand or know. Have I been bashing my family on my online personal journal?! But I never in the slightest meant to give the image that my parents are the worst parents or bad people. I just state the truth of what's happening and what's been said and how I feel about it - at the moment. I was in my - good period - where I can only explain that I've been feeling really loved this last week - till I got this one email. I'll be honest - kind of typical to expect this kind of energy from the brother. Same energy from dad. But Dads just seems to be happy that I produced some art and have entered an Art show. I'll try my best to not let the negative things my brother said to me get me but - it's famil...

Happy Halloween Yesterday was a long day for me, like every other day now a days. I did a lot to push forward in what I need to be doing. I'm strongly now thinking of moving into the guest room. However when I do that, my mom will for sure fill up my current room with stuff. My mom is a hoarder if I never mentioned before. The room is smaller but its closer to my work space. Sacrifice? Gains? I really need to fully Submerge myself in what I need to do to get where I need to be. My brother is fighting me on the basement. His domain. For a guy who moved to Australia and applied for permanent residency - who has a condo he's thinking of moving back into when he returns. Does it make a whole lot of sense for him to occupy a whole level - when and if he returns - will he be jobless?. He does trades - stock exchange stuff. Really? Brother? What are you building that is currently equal or more to what I am currently building. I think my biggest upset with my family is that - It'...